February 2025: Time for the Monthlies
Thank god for a short month!
Welcome to Black History Month. The federal government has eliminated it, yet Trump is still celebrating it? Making this Black History Month kind of.. weird. Not knowing where you’re standing seems to be the point of the administration’s opening salvo. And wherever it is you may be standing, it’s definitely weird.
We have the discussion of Kash Patel as FBI director, with a dossier on him landing for our enjoyment. Everything in the dossier would lead normal people to say, Don’t put him in charge, but we shall see…. It’s not like there are any ethical concerns with the rest of his cabinet or that anyone he hires will just go along with illegal orders. Does it even matter who is in charge, when they’re already making noises about firing FBI agents involved in January 6 – those quelling it, to be clear, because we all know if they had been on the other side they’d get a statue.
Tariffs on China kick off, with JP Morgan shipping $4Billion in gold in advance. I’m not clear on this impact, but I’m sure it’s related to all those screaming Buy Gold! commercials on Fox and Newsmax. USAID is closed by Musk and Trump, and I’m wondering why people call it U-S-A-I-D when US AID is right there. (Or even U SAID, if you wanted more of a Yo Mama energy.)
SCOTUS determines that banning gun sales to adults under 21 is unconstitutional. Can’t wait to have more armed 18 year olds in Walmart. Maybe they will lose their guns when they use a fake ID to buy alcohol. The New York Times, never failing to disappoint, gives us a little cartoon about marriage and patriarchy that I think is supposed to be inspiring. But really, it follows the formula that teaching your man how to be good/helpful/thoughtful falls on the woman’s shoulders. Don’t worry, ladies! Maybe you can squeeze it in between making cupcakes and sucking his cock. The first shot across the bow is fired at abortion, with a NY doctor criminally indicted for prescribing abortion pills across state lines. So make sure he pulls out, and clean that up too!
We also learn about Musk’s Twink Army, set forth in the federal agencies, seeking fraud and waste like an incel seeking Andrew Tate. This group of juniors, most of whom can now buy a gun, thanks to SCOTUS, are clearly tech geniuses. They left a gaping security hole in the DOGE site, allowing anyone to push updates to it. They have access to the IT systems controlling federal agencies, leading to much concern about privacy and overreach. No one knows who is ‘in charge’ here (what a quaint idea!) let alone what they’re doing. But somehow, they just get to ... keep on doing it? WTF, America.
Continuing the deportation push (where they deported fewer people than Biden did? I mean, come ON, get your shit together, evil overlords, you kind of stink at this), now they want to get their hands on the list of unaccompanied minors who migrated. I’m sure it’s to give them a Happy Meal.
We got rising microplastics in us, including our brains (better or worse than a worm?), which tells me this is great time to eliminate the EPA. That asteroid they discovered recently keeps increasing its chances of an impact with earth, up to 2.3%. Bring it on.
And this is just the start of February. Thank god this is a short month!
On to Musk, and his grift. As the month goes on, the media is starting to wise up to Musk and public opinion. Which is – no one likes him, no one voted for him, and he’s a little prick. They sense they can start poking at him safely (we all know Trump isn’t loyal, so if Musk loses public opinion, he’ll throw him over as ballast in a second). The grift is getting brazen – the US State Department lets slip they’re planning to spend $400 million on Tesla armored vehicles (wtf are they going to be, cybertrucks in GI Joe drag?), but then quickly remove the reference to Tesla when it's covered in the news. Still, we’ve seen the plans, and they don’t jibe with Musk’s mission to cut billions in federal spending. The whole thing is starting to seem – even to those who are barely paying attention – as if it’s just a way to funnel money to Musk and other rich people. (No shit!) Musk’s firms have always been subsidized by the government, to the tune of $38 billion. I don’t know anyone on Medicaid who’s gotten that much, even with hip and knee replacements. Seems like it could be a good place to cut and get some big savings.
The administration’s all-out war on DEI continues apace. Pam Bondi announces that the DOJ will be going after private companies for DEI. This is one step beyond the chilling effect and straight into vigilantism. Oh, here’s some more: A website that calls out federal workers who have been involved with DEI is published. What do you think is planned for these workers? A Happy Meal?
Right around here we have the Superbowl, with Kendrick Lamar’s halftime show. I thought it was brilliant, layered, meaningful, and also a good show to watch. (Unlike Rihanna shuffling around on a lift, which just made me worried she was going to fall off while also annoyed there wasn’t anything happening.) A lotta talk about the Drake diss, but the overall American-ness – real, un-jingofied American-ness – was what hit me. Samuel L Jackson as Uncle Sam/Tom? The clown car? More of this, please. Lamar didn’t need to diss Trump directly – the whole show was an indictment of American BS, which has led us to Trump and his minions.
This actual piece of art was swiftly followed by Trump making himself head of the Kennedy Center, because he doesn’t like their woke drag shows. Even though he admits he’s never been. This leads to some artists pulling out of their shows, but don’t worry, because they might be replaced by the J6 Prison Choir! Yes, that’s right, those pardoned insurrections, who are not even trained singers, may end up on stage. What is this world coming to?!
So that’s the art world, “woke” artists still winning, because a heck of a lot more people want to listen to Kendrick Lamar than that choir or Kid Rock. Moving on to the climate… oh, yeah. We need good music to get through this. In his continued capitulation, Jeff Bezos nixes his funding for Science Based Targets initiative, meaning he can now stick his shined head outside and say “There is no climate change because it’s chilly out” or something. In the continued trend of weaponizing the justice system, a fossil fuel firm’s lawsuit against Greenpeace starts. This case is “a classic strategic lawsuit against public participation (Slapp) – a form of civil litigation increasingly deployed by corporations, politicians and wealthy individuals to deliberately wear down and silence critics including journalists, activists and watchdog groups.” This is nothing new, but constitutional rights experts call this case baseless, bad faith litigation that threatens free speech. More on free speech and Bezos later – stay tuned!
The Louisiana Department of Health says it will no longer promote mass vaccination, the FDA cancels the meeting to update next year’s flu vaccines, and a child dies from measles in Texas. But don’t worry, because RFK Jr. says measles outbreaks are “not unusual”. I guess they won’t be soon! Red looks good on everyone, don’t you think? Kristi Noem tells CNN that you “can’t trust our government”, to which the host reminds her, “You are our government.” I guess it doesn’t seem real to them, either.
The assault on trans people continues, although less prominently. RFK Jr.’s HHS redefines sex as only two genders. Trans people are receiving passports back with their birth gender, even though the EO isn’t yet law. (There is a comment period til March 17 where you can make your voice heard on this – please comment!) We see Iowa voting to remove trans people from civil rights protections. Many organizations, particularly non-profits, are scrubbing their sites of any reference to trans people, including the Boys and Girls Club (well, they could just be the Children’s Club!). Trans troops are effectively banned, and in typical whitewashing fashion the mainstream press tries to dress it up as it’s okay, see there’s a get-out clause baked in! But there is no waiver for trans troops, except de-transition and deny being trans. Fed prisons are going to move trans prisoners to a facility that matches their gender at birth. Can’t imagine this going well, although that’s the point. (I do hope the prisoners all step up and give the trans people the Luigi treatment!)
Batshit asshole Chris Rufo (I’m not linking to anything he does, btw) “exposes” the transgender cult in the federal government, which is a few employees on IM talking about LGBTQ issues. Still, they’re purged from their departments. And I’m sure they won’t be the first. (Make sure you look manly enough, Rufo, because you could be next to be cancelled. After all you do have an unseemly obsession with trans people.) We see judges blocking the orders to ban gender-affirming care, but this is going to be an uphill climb, one with a LOT of lawsuits. It’s a good time to be a lawyer (as always). So yeah, trans people, and undoubtedly soon, the rest of the acronym, are under attack.
A digression here: Whatever you can do to support and fight for the rights of trans people, do it. If the fight is left just to trans people, they’ll lose it. There aren’t enough of them. They have to out themselves to do this, and that puts them in danger. Think of all the nature shows you’ve seen – where the herd protects the predator’s target. We need to do that here. Otherwise, the predator will pick all of us off, one by one.
When he’s not figuring out new ways to harass trans people or golf, Trump has been pushing Ukraine to give him all their minerals, and basically roll over to Putin. I feel like I can hear the bat slapping into a plam, with a mafioso growl of “Nice minerals you got here…” with a side of a bully playing Go Fish (Gimme all your lithium!). I guess they haven’t been watching Zelensky, because he and his t-shirts are not going to cave easily. He said Trump is living in a “Kremlin disinformation bubble”, which, yes. The more outside leaders, like Macron does with his fact-checking, puncture the bullshit yesmen that surround Trump and his ilk, the better. The world sees what is going on and can call it like it is. Bezos doesn’t own Zelenskyy’s mouth like he owns the Washington Post and can control what comes out of it. Yet.
The oligarchy continues galloping along, with Musk at the helm. We see pictures from the Oval Office, with Trump slumped at his desk and Musk roaming the room, his stupidly-named child on his shoulders. The cabinet meeting appears to show Musk standing up, leading this band of flunkies. We all know Musk is running the show. He paid to get here and Trump is happy to A) not be in jail and B) line his pockets. Apparently Trump’s goal/dream/fantasy is to end all the wars and get a Nobel Peace Prize. I’m not even joking. He has propagandists out there planting this seed to the top echelons of the business world. I’ve sat there and heard it, insane as it sounds.
But back to Musk, the real leader. He’s been busy gutting any department that has blocked him in the past, like the CSFB, the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration and the FAA. I don’t know what the Department of Ed did to him, except maybe teach people to think, or even just read The Emperor’s New Clothes? He wants to deorbit the ISS, which surely is just a ploy to funnel every contract to SpaceX. He’s prancing around on stage with a chainsaw. He announced “I am become meme”, which, no, because if you have to say it, then you’re not. (It’s like being cool, Elon, so I get why you don’t understand this.) He claims there are millions of people collecting social security who are over one hundred and must surely be dead, but it turns out, it’s a coding thing? Maybe this “genius” should have realized that before making this announcement?! DOGE claims billions in savings, and then when these numbers are wrong, they just.. disappear them. They float the idea of giving these “savings” to the American people, which would be around three bucks each. I am going to go circle the White House on my BMX, demanding my “Two dollars. I want my two dollars!”
All in, he seems increasingly manic. I think we’ve all seen enough TV to know what happens when people are manic. They crash. We know about his drug use, from his own lips, and while ketamine may be a legitimate treatment, I’m pretty sure he’s using it the same way bored housewives used uppers in the 50s. It may be prescribed, but it’s being abused. And there is no drug that you can do that with and not have some sort of negative impact on you. He just had another kid with another rando, who probably thought she was the one who would “catch” him (oh honey, see Grimes, Instagram). What drives him? It’s vaguely interesting, because he’s so public with his desperation and need, but ultimately he is so boring. He’s an AI-written villain, generic in every way. This gossip, of a botched penile implant, is unsubstantiated but big (small?) if true. I can totally see his wonk dick being the reason he acts the way he does. And his trans kid is why he wants to eradicate trans people. News flash, Musk. Trans people have always existed, and always will. Government recognition is not required for existence. Also, his dick issues and his need to father children is a great way to bring about his downfall. We need a Mata Hari to go in there and take one for the team, and bring him down.
What else, what else. Everything is so stupid, and so awful. We haven’t yet felt the cascade of hurt from all of these changes. They’re hitting in spots, for certain populations – federal employees getting fired, transgender people – but big picture, the financial impact hasn’t yet hit everyone. I think it’s coming, though. You can’t fire so many people and think it’s not going to affect the economy. Couple it with tariffs which increase prices and – voila. We’re in for a shit storm.
The USPS is under fire (I love the post office, well, not every post office, as some are truly kooky with real a-holes in there, but the concept of this network that covers the country and connects us all, and then the actual mail – getting a real letter is just amazing!), the State Department stops media subscriptions, because what are you reading for?!, Trump endorses some Black dude for the Florida governor race (sorry, Ron, I don’t know what you’re going to do now, and I’m sure we’ll learn more about this new guy later, but I don’t have the headspace to do it now), and Trump keeps floating his third term bullshit. It is both bullshit and also a true threat, and he keeps floating it to normalize the idea to people. Every single time it comes up, someone – multiple people – need to loudly say why it’s bullshit. We need something that is automatically negatively correlated with the concept in people’s minds, like a Trump third term = corrupt oligarch taking all our money. We shouldn’t use the term King, or any other self-aggrandizing term Trump likes to throw around. Drag him into the prosaic and use terms that people don’t like. Felon. I don’t hear that nearly enough.
Steve Bannon trots out a (half-assed, plausibly-deniable) Nazi salute at CPAC, which is normal. I mean don’t you see people Sieg Heil-ing hello all over the place? (NO! NO I DO NOT!) The administration shuts down the national police misconduct database, which will immediately end all police shootings and beatings of people. If you don’t count it, it hasn’t happened! (Honestly I feel like this database is bs at the best of times, and internal affairs just works to cover everything up, but still, it should exist, faulty as it may be.) Kash Patel and his hit list get confirmed as FBI director. GOP rolls over for belly rubs, good boy.
The courts are putting a halt to many things the administration is doing, from firings to USAID, but now we’re wondering, will Trump and his cronies actually follow the court’s orders? Finally, some media pieces talk about how this is, in fact, a crisis. I don’t know why people or pundits think they WILL follow the orders. How naïve is everyone? How hopeful that this will just blow over and things will settle down? Insane.
Trump is arguing that he can fire administrative law judges, and the DOJ just puts its head on the block and lets it happen. Oh SCOTUS. I hope you felt a chill down your neck at this, because the minute you don’t rubber stamp whatever the hell he wants next, you’re going to be out. Whether it’s out a window or just out on your ass, who knows. But you are not safe either. No one is.
He's going to use military sites to house migrants, which feels like the first step in disappearing them to me. Some enormous crypto hack happened, quel surprise. Bird flu is now endemic in cows, but Trump is cutting funding and staff. We’re hearing how national parks are understaffed, trash is piling up, which you know means 1) they don’t work so 2) let’s sell them! Oh, let me guess who will be first in line to buy Yosemite.
It won’t be Joe Average, because consumer sentiment is dropping due to inflation and the prospect of tariffs. So Americans do understand how tariffs work then? Luigi Mangione went back to court, serving serious face again/always. I saw a picture of his sockless loafered feet under the table – a close-up - and thought, that photographer knows his audience! Has anyone seen Luigi in their toast yet?
An oarfish keeps flopping around on the shores of Mexico, typically an omen of bad things. I mean really bad things - it’s known as the doomsday fish. But who’s superstitious, it’s just a fish!
The Last Week of February
And now it’s the last week! It’s a short month! How bad could it be?
Ha! Welcome to the rest of the month. Got $5 million? Wanna be a citizen? Trump’s got you covered. He’s gonna need it to fill these holes, now that DOGE just erased its biggest cuts from its site. Can you say bait and switch? Trump is a boardwalk shyster from his casino days, he’s just playing the shell game on a much larger scale now. Tightening its grip on the propaganda machine, the White House takes over the press pool. Writing this is frightening and also so embarrassing. We’re going to let this guy be the dictator? I feel like Jason Bateman in Arrested Development – “Her?” It’s a little shocking to realize that people are just going along with this, and a lot really like it. Or are just oblivious to it. There was a skeet about how relaxing it would be to be the average white guy who can ignore the news, or see it at separate from them. That would be chill.
Zelensky says he’ll resign if that brings peace, having kind of ignored the mineral deal. I feel like I hear Americans talking about it. Well and an South African too. It’s playing out like a freaking cartoon – hero and villain. Good guy Zelensky, heart of gold, Gallant. And then Trump, the buffoon, the conniving asshole. Goofus. You know who you’re supposed to root for. But Goofus makes you laugh, and is he really so bad as all that? Shit, I think Goofus and Gallant fucking groomed us for Trump. Highlights was sanctimonious as fuck, which is why you cheered on Goofus. We’re all a little bit of a mess in real life, Gallant was too perfect. But when you realize Goofus is actually a sociopath intent on destroying society, you gulp and think oh shit this isn’t fun any more.
The HUD screens are hacked and we see AI generated Trump fondling and suckling the two right feet of Elon. This video was hilarious and perverse, and that I haven’t seen much of it since the day it was screened says a lot about how the media environment is cracking down. That was pure meme. It should be everywhere. Why isn’t it? Maybe because it was actually a little too graphic, too porny in its execution. I don’t really want to see it again with its uncanniness. The two right feet, front and center. A reminder that AI can do this. It can make you look like you’re doing anything. And next time, it might not be so obvious that it’s fake.
Bezos makes a mockery of the Washington Post, saying it’s opinion section will now only focus on personal liberties and free markets. Cool, cool, sounds like Silk Road, is Amazon going to start selling HGH now? The new fuckwit heading up the EPA is encouraging Trump to strike down a scientific finding that basically underpins the government’s approach to stop climate change. I do have to ask, how does one strike down a scientific finding? I guess the same way you strike down gender, just say it isn’t true. And lo, people just fall in line. It’s the Taming of the Shrew, modern-style. (speaking of shrews, where IS Melania…)
Trump tweeted some seriously weird AI (not to be confused with Weird Al, who is amazing) video about the future of Gaza, with bearded belly dancers and condos. Turns out it was created by some Hollywood guys, was meant to be satirical, and they don’t know how it got to Trump, but Mel Gibson might have been involved. Way to go, sugartits.
The worst part of all this? They told us what they were going to do and it seems like only randos like myself believed them. The people in charge, who could have DONE something about this, were in some bubble and thought it was just “talk”. If you want to see how far along their path they are, check out this Project 2025 tracker from Politico. Read it and weep.
Trump brings trafficker and racist Andrew Tate (and his d-list brother) back from wherever we left him. He’s just so gross. You know he’s a terrible fuck just by looking at him. Trump closes the portal for repaying student debt, but surely he will keep adding penalties for non-payment. Gene Hackman found dead and mummified (??!!) with his wife at home. I love Gene Hackman. Every movie he was in wasn’t great, but he was great in every movie. The Pope can’t breathe, and I’m just waiting for real life Conclave to start. And the US is getting an official language, just in time for the country as we know it to disappear. (Spoiler: it’s English.) Meta screws up and their algorithim posts gore, dead bodies and violence. (Actually how is this different than the usual crap they churn to us?) Musk begs retired air traffic controllers to come back, although didn’t he just fire a whole shit ton of people at the FAA? Also, do we want old people doing this? I feel like someone with good eyes and reflexes is needed and those noticeably worsen as you get older. Maybe they are retired for a reason. (Oooh, possibly Mitch McConnell could retrain for this opportunity!)
SCOTUS is about to hear a case from a straight (and white) plaintiff alleging discrimination, and probably going to find in their favor. The law currently requires majority groups (whites, heterosexuals) to show a higher burden of proof in these cases. So it’s unequal and makes sense – on paper – to do away with it. In reality, though – I bet we’re going to see a bazillion white people suing after getting fired or not getting a promotion. Lucky for us, a bazillion people are getting fired by the government so we can test this theory pretty quickly! Musk sends out emails to fed employees, in a baller big boss move (/sarcasm), telling them to justify their work there or get out. This is the petty micromanagement of every terrible boss out there. We all recognize it, and we all shake our heads at it. What jagoff this guy is. Even some department heads know it and tell their staff not to respond. It’s just a big mess and who looks stupid? DOGE looks stupid.
AND SWEET JESUS, the last day of the month and the whole world is pissed off. Trump and Zelensky have a meeting, in which Trump just acts like a complete asshole (SURPRISE BET YOU DIDN’T SEE THAT COMING) and barks at Zelensky that he’s bringing on WW3 (hello, I think that would be Putin’s job!), Vance leans in and channels pissed off meemaw with “Have you even said thank you?”, and L’il Marco Rubio looks real little in his big boy seat, like his feet don’t even touch the floor little. (If he presses himself any deeper in that sofa Vance may end up banging him.) Zelensky held his end well, was composed, and left without signing shit.
Someone keeps trying to push the narrative that Zelensky was disrespectful for not wearing a suit, but GTFO with that shit, when you have Elon in a T-shirt, shades over his enormous pupils, and a trucker cap. Trump and crew were just pissed that they couldn’t boss him around and hand Ukraine to Putin like a corsage on prom night, thinking it’s a guaranteed panty-dropper. How can they not know that Putin will roofie the fuck outta them, have his way with them, then put the videos in his vault for future blackmail purposes? These entitled guys have never had to deal with, well, themselves, at a frat party. No savvy, no street smarts. They think they’re the smartest people in the room because they’re all telling each other they are between lines of whatever they're doing, and they don’t even notice any other people, let alone recognize that they’re outsmarted. (Although, there is a part of them that does recognize this, which is why they’re so hellbent on smothering DEI. It’s less competition for them, and they don’t have to make so much of an effort to succeed in the good ol’boy club.)
Anyway, the world responds much as you would expect, with disgust and revulsion for Trump and support for Ukraine. Russia calls Zelensky a “cocaine clown”, which is a great term and there should be an entire cocaine circus created because I would go to that, but as a slight it’s far more appropriate for Don Jr. The US has an “economic blackout” on the 28th, meaning we’re not supposed to buy anything for one day, which is a fairly pathetic act of resistance. One day? Whoop-de-doo. We’re not hurting corporations by putting off a purchase for a day, which is basically what this amounts to. But at least people are starting to think about what they can do in this FUBAR world of ours. It may be too little, we may be too fragmented, the steamroller may have gained too much momentum, but people are starting to wake up and see what’s happening. It’s been a little over a month of this administration and our country is turning inside out. I don’t know what’s going to be left in 12 months. Let’s just get through March in one piece if we can.
Doubleplusgood!
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